She was standing there holding the railing. I grabbed her from back, putiing my hands around her belly and planted a kiss on her neck. My already hard prick was pressing against her ass cheeks. I soon lay a bedsheet on the floor and sat down resting my back on the railing and she sat in between my spreaded legs. I put my arms around her and started squeezing her breast while kissing her in her neck. I asked her if she was felling bad or shy, she said,”No”. Then I asked her to remove her clothes then She immediately got up and pulled down her nightie. There she was, standing in front of me wearing only bra and panty. Her white body was shining in moonlight like crystal. She again sat in the same position. I immediately in buckled her bra and removed it. She had a lovely pair of mediem sized boobs with pink nipples. I simply squeezed them hard and kissed her. She did it. I too got up and removed my night suit. She pulled down my underwear. We were all naked before each other now. I. So many boots have tread through, tearing up my heart and dragging mud through my house. For once, I would love to be kissed with passion when joined by my partner. I would love to hear the words ‘I want you to feel good.’ And what of these men who pass into the background noise of my head? Do they only wait for me to be weak and vulnerable? I care deeply and I deny not my love for the men I’ve shared my heart with. Mom taught me sex without love is a degradation of one’s soul. Mom, I really tried to love them all, but they couldn’t handle my wild heart. So if it’s just been sex, and all my unselfish gestures go to waste eventually, where do I turn now? It’s always been about him. Whether it was this ‘him’, or that ‘him’, didn’t really matter. I’ve poured myself into making it ‘work’ over and over only accomplishing to tear a hole in some guy’s heart and leave myself drained and devastated. I’ve spent the better part of my adulthood trying to convince my spirit that life was easier.
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